Man Watches Infomercial So Long That Product Seems Viable

Bacon, DE- Local resident, Jeremiah Bologna, 31, was said to watch the Magic Bullet infomercial three times in a row before even noticing he was sitting at the edge of his couch completely enthralled with what was now blaring at top volume on his television at four a.m.

“When it first came on I couldn’t help but think that it was the most ridiculous commercial I had ever seen. But, when they started doing demonstrations of all the things the Magic Bullet could do, I couldn’t resist becoming a fan. Not only is the product just amazing, the people in this commercial are so loveable,” Bologna said as he was furiously ripping apart the mail he received hoping that one of the packages would contain the Magic Bullet he ordered.

Bologna continued, “The commercial starts off the morning after this massive like, ‘End of the World’ party at Mick and Mimi’s house. It really took me back to my college days, of course there would have been more chicks at one of my parties. Anyway, the guests wake up one by one all hungover and looking ragged. Lucky for them Mimi and Mick are pumped to show them their favorite party accessory- The Magic Bullet!”

“I would say that my favorite characters would be Hazel and Berman. Hazel is continuously smoking a cigarette that is looming to fall out of her mouth, but it never does, it’s amazing! She’s amazing! And that Berman, oh man, he is a trip. He stumbles out into the kitchen looking like he drank a half gallon of Heaven Hill vodka. I love it! The rest of the guests proceed to make fun of him being a raging drunk for the rest of the commercial! It’s wonderful!” Bologna said, his smile never in danger of leaving his face.


Bologna went on for the better part of thirteen hours telling me his favorite parts of the infomercial which turned out to be every single part, multiple times. Jeremiah then launched into a thirty-five minute diatribe on how the commercial depicts the need for close friends to have a sleep over at least once a month.


Watch Part I of Infomercial

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